Fossil brings Dawkins into the Faith

With the discovery of a fossilized human skeleton within the rib cage of a 65 million year old Tyrannosaurus Rex, evolutionary biologists are having to rethink everything. “I can’t believe how wrong I was.” Said evolutionary defender Daniel Dennett, “I was just sure it was true. I mean really sure.” Representatives from the New York Natural History Museum and the Smithsonian Institute flew to Kentucky to visit the Creation Museum to learn how to update their displays to reflect the new information. “They’ve had it right all along.” Said Niles Eldrige the director of the NY Museum and former evolutionist. The big news came when the venerable scientific journal Evolution announced it would be renamed, Evolution (Not) and would focus on publishing more evidence that the Earth was less than 10,000 years old.

The most surprising news was from Oxford where long time evolution promoter and defender Richard Dawkins, declared he was now a Young Earth Creationist. “You have to follow the evidence,” He said, “and the human in a T-Rex is irrefutable.” Asked if he would be joining the Christian Evangelical movement he shook his head and said, “No. I’ve always said that if I wasn’t an Atheist, I’d be a Mormon. I’ve got an incredible singing voice, and I’m heading to Salt Lake to be baptized and join the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. The LDS Church’s official Newsroom put out a statement this morning, “We welcome Dr. Dawkins to the fold and his contributions in both music and science will be most welcome.”

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2 Responses to Fossil brings Dawkins into the Faith

  1. CK Rock says:

    You forgot to mention the part about how Dawkins plans on revising his seminal book and titling it, “The Charitable Gene.”

    Love the post.

  2. What is it with evolutionary biologists, even just those “at heart” like me and April Fool’s pranks. My first prank of the day involved telling my daughter that vestigial wings were discovered on Asian elephants, evidencing hexapodism in mammals.
    Her response (while rolling her eyes), “right, now they can play with my Pegasuses”.

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